Goodbyes...

I hate saying goodbye...

I hate going to the airport and dropping someone in the departure area (may it be for a short trip or otherwise).

I hate that…

I’m not good at it but I pretend to put up a brave face when I’m forced… Wait! Forced is a negative word let me rephrase that… when I “must” go there.

The last time I was there was when my Ate Cindy and her family left for Canada. That’s almost three years ago. Before that, I don’t remember anymore. I’m telling you, the scene that took place before they went through the immigration was not nice. I was crying all over the place. My Ate and I were hugging each other and crying our heads out as my two nephews looked on with traumatized expressions… Hahaha! Nico, the eldest, was in the verge of crying too while Victor was asking his Daddy why we were acting that way… I could still remember all the habilins my Ate gave me and all the assurance… Oh well… those were the times of uncertainties… Mind you! I didn’t care if a lot of people were staring at us. Hehehe!

ENOUGH! That is not the reason why I’m blogging about goodbyes…

Last night at around 11pm Jet fetched me here at home to go to his house. His sister, Fatima was leaving for the States and I wanted to see her before she leaves. Although we are not that close, I still feel she is a part of my family (if God permits it). It is also my way of showing her my support and love. So at around 12midnight we arrived at their place and just hanged out. Waited until she’s done with her last minute packing, checking and habilins. By 3AM, two vans packed (our van contained Me, Jet, Fatima and two of her female friends and the other van being driven by Fritz has Shang, Tata, France and two of Fatima’s male friends), we slowly headed for NAIA. Her flight was at 7am so three hours before the said flight she must be inside already.

Jet was tensed the whole time. I couldn’t even make him smile. I don’t blame him. I know what he’s going through… Parang lahat ay naka fast forward… Million things going through your mind. Emotions going up and down. You wanted to cry but you can’t. Well… not yet.

When we got there, all of us (except Fritz and France who parked the vans) went to this designated area where in passengers could still spend a little more time with their family before going inside. Nerve wracking! Is all I could say. Jet was smoking the whole time and trying to distance himself from our pack. Shang was silent too. Fatima was with her friends making little conversations. I on the other hand, was smiling. Smiling. Why in the hell was I smiling when people around me were silent and lost in their own thoughts trying not to cry? Because I didn’t want to cry. I didn’t want to start crying and I could feel tears starting to form but I didn’t want them to see me cry for god sake! Then Fritz arrived with Franz and Tata. Picture time… The four siblings are complete for the last time. I wanted to take more pictures but then after a few moments of laughter and biruan… naging serious nanaman silang apat. When Fatima started hugging her friends it signaled that its time for her to go inside. She then turned to Shang and embraced him, then Fritz, then Jet… All the while Franz and Tata were making comments about crying is like a infectious disease and how Franz is already used to seeing people leave all his life. I was laughing with them and every now and then I would look away. Then suddenly Fatima, Shang, Fritz and Jet hugged each other and they were crying. God! That was the moment! The moment that I really wanted to cry. Even Franz and Tata was surprised by it and was silent until Franz broke the ice and asked “Sinong may yosi? Penge yosi naman oh!”…

Ewan, it was crazy… All the memories suddenly came to me. How the four of them would have these silly fights and how they would remain silent maski apat nalang sila sa house (ever since their mother left for America almost three years ago and their father don’t live in their house anymore). I mean, lacking with parental guidance, they had a rough time. But in the end they patched things up and showed us how they’ve matured over the years. Forgiveness has been given, old clashes have been forgotten, wounds have been healed and they’ve survived, until one of them has to leave. Painful I know… But that’s life. At least before Fatima left things are all right.

After seeing Fatima off, Jet and I together with Shang went to Quezon City. Time for me to go home. But before that we had breakfast at this Pares Pares that Jet and I loved. We let Shang have his first taste of Pares Pares the Q.C. way… By 5:30am I was finally home.

~~~~

Now that things are a little bit different in their house, I know they’ll be okay.

I know goodbye is sometimes a good thing because it let you show how much you love the person you’re saying goodbye to and sometimes it sucks because you won’t be seeing that person for a very very long time. Either way for me, I still hate saying goodbye… I would rather fetch them from the airport even if his or her flight gets delayed… I’ll be there the whole day. Hehehe!