We had a fight last night and I don’t know why, I just snapped.
Last Friday we didn’t go out as we usually do because he had a seminar to attend and I just went to Marikina to celebrate Jai’s birthday. I got too much to drink so he decided to fetch me even though it was already twelve in the evening and he’ll be coming from Muntinlupa. He brought me home, changed my clothes and put me to bed. Not much talk, he just stared at me while I slept. At around 3am, he went home. And me, I was too drunk to know anything not until the next day and he told me what happened. Aww... it was so sweet of him… And I really appreciate what he did. It was a good day right?
Sunday. He arrived at around 3pm his class was from 9am till 12nn. We went to Loyola Memorial Park to pay the caretaker of my father’s grave. After that we met some friends there and stayed for a while till 5:30pm. After that we went to Gateway Mall to buy some stuff for my mother. Around 7:30 we went to Tiendesitas to eat our favorite empanada and buy stuff for my dogs. Then went to my place to watch T.V. until he goes home.
The fight. I don’t know how it all started. We were talking about our schedule. That Tuesday won’t be possible for us to see each other again because he’ll be going out of town for a project. Bummer! I don’t why I was irritated with what he said. But it all started there. I was angry but not to him but the schedule and the things I can’t control or beyond me. I was irritated because I told him “bitin” yung pagkikita namin. Maybe he was tired, but because of that he got mad too. We we’re shouting things that I don’t remember anymore. But! Walang murahan ha. We might jokingly mura each other like “gagah ka kasi” or “siraulo ka” when we goof around but when we fight, we don’t say those stuff to each other, maybe because we respect each other too much to do that. What I remember is that I was irritable the whole morning of that day. I was extra sensitive. Maybe it’s just time of the month. I don’t know. I just have this urge to make him pikon or pick fight. I just want to see him mad. Crazy I know. Maybe I’m having PMS.
Oh life! He went home that night angry. He didn’t message me if he got home safe. I had trouble sleeping. I didn’t want to text him because I know he won’t respond. And I hate that. So I just let him be. Let things cool down. Come to think of it, it’s been a long long long time since we had a fight like this. We don’t usually argue because of our schedules. I just don’t know why I had the urge to pick fight that night and be mega sensitive. I don’t want to justify my actions. I just have to say sorry. I know it was my fault. Just have to look for the right time to talk to him. He’s busy in school and I don’t want to cause more stress.
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I just read Ate Cindy’s e-mail it’s a forward message about finding a guy. After reading it I thought about Jet and how it very much reminds me of him. Funny, maybe my sister could sense that Jet and I had a fight. Hehehe! For me the letter was like a splash of cold water. Wake up! Don’t push him away… Few men are like that now a days… I’m lucky to have him. He’s not good looking but he has a good heart and understanding mind. And I’m just plain stupid.
Here’s an excerpt:
Find a guy, who calls you beautiful instead of hot.
Who calls you back when you hang up on him.
Who will stay awake just to watch you sleep.
Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead.
Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats.
Who holds your hand in front of his friends.
Wait for the one who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you.
Wait for the one who turns to his friends and says, "...that's her."
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