Paulo Coelho

Never give up.

When your heart becomes tired,

just walk with your legs - but move on.

Thoughts

MI 30 or Soft-Disco MI???

Decisions... decisions... decisions...

What am I to do???

Thoughts

I don't know if I should feel flattered or scared. Flattered that I was hand-picked from so many agents or be scared because it is totally a new ball game - again.

I don't know... I'll think about it when January comes. For the meantime, enjoy what's left of 2010! :)

Paulo Coelho

Love perseveres. It’s people who change.

Thoughts

"Fate brings you together, but its still up to you to make it happen. We may meet someone by chance, but keeping that someone
is still a choice."


And I'm definitely keeping you. Love you...

For My Love...

The greatest thing in life is finding someone who knows all of your mistakes and weaknesses and still finds you completely amazing and will never walk away...

On Love

If we lose love, we lose it for a reason. The reason may be hard to understand, but know that God takes away when He has something better to give.

Gifts

Thank you for all the gifts Love...
Really really loooveee them all :) :) :)

Hhmmmm........

cno itey??? girlaloo o boylaloo? secret walang clue! HAHAHA!!!!

Laying All The Cards Down

What's the difference between loving someone and being in love with someone?

~~~~~

I couldn't sleep for the past few days. It was like I was carrying something heavy and I was irritable.

Every little thing he does makes me angry or hate him.

I knew I had to tell him something about how I really felt deep inside. In truth it was me that I hated. It was not him. I was just projecting how I felt about myself. It was a constant battle inside me. I was mad. I was angry. I was frustrated.

Guilt.

Guilty for not feeling the same way he felt about me. For not giving the same way he is giving himself to me.

And I wanted to cry out every time I felt the pressure.

I asked him to come by at our house at 2 in the morning. I really felt the need to speak to him no matter what the time was. Whether he was sleeping or not, I felt I needed to see him. Good thing he couldn't sleep too.

I told him everything I needed to tell him without fear of rejection. I owe him that. The truth.

He felt a little bit hurt. But he said it doesn't make him love me any less. He said he is willing to wait.

Ever since then, I felt free. I feel no pressure.

At least now I don't have to pretend. I don't need to pressure myself and it felt liberating.

I feel I'm learning to fall IN love again.

Little by little.

I'm enjoying and appreciating all the things he shows and gives me. His little lambing and being open with our relationship. And I'm not pressured to do the same.

He said, "In your own time."

It felt good.

It feels good.

Thank you love... Thank you for everything...

Thank you for coming into my life.

Hahaha!

"The hypothalamus is one of the most important parts of the brain, involved in many kinds of motivation, among other functions. The hypothalamus controls the "Four F's": fighting, fleeing, feeding, and mating."
~Unknown psychology professor in neuropsychology course

Thoughts

"I believe that we are solely responsible for our choices, and we have to accept the consequences of every deed, word, and thought throughout our lifetime."
- Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

Love...

Thank you for making the day special and for all the gifts. You really know how to spoil me. Love them all! Hihihi!!!

Had a very tiring day but everything was worth it. Mega kanta ako maski I don't like singing. Once I started you couldn't take the mic away, maski sintunado na. Hahaha!

Love you!!! Mwah! Mwah!

Later another celebration with my girlies. Miss them so much...

Whaaaa!!!

Can't wait for later... I'm so freaking excited! Finally, it's Friday.

Keeping my fingers cross for something hopefully nice later...

Hmmm... Just hoping he did got my subtle hints... *wink* *wink* *wink*

:) :) :)

Lemar - The Way Love Goes

The Way Love Goes by Lemar

i never thought that i would ever love again
i might be wrong cos i can feel it happening
a little scared but i am not petrified
i love forever, i promise to stay by your side
heart broken, my first and never spoken
i waited to hear and i gave it a year
so i stopped holding on and then you came along
and then you came along
i’m gonna, i’m i’m i’m gonna

i hold you, i love you the best that i can
until you understand that i need you
and i can’t dance alone cos the beat’s just too slow
that’s just the way love goes,
that’s just the way love goes (uh uh)

i used to think that i would never get to be
in love again cos that was the only one for me
and now i feel that you have come and saved me
this heart of mine awoken by your smile
heart broken, my first and never spoken
i waited to hear and i gave it a year
so i stopped holding on and then you came along
and then you came along
i’m gonna, i’m i’m i’m gonna

i hold you, i love you the best that i can
until you understand that i need you
and i can’t dance alone cos the beat’s just too slow
that’s just the way love goes,
that’s just the way love goes

i hold you, i love you the best that i can
until you understand that i need you
and i can’t dance alone cos the beat’s just too slow
that’s just the way love goes,
that’s just the way love goes

(gotta get strong, keep moving on)

someone’s coming to save me
someone’s coming to save me
save me, save me, save me

i hold you, i love you the best that i can
until you understand that i need you
and i can’t dance alone cos the beat’s just too slow
that’s just the way love goes,
that’s just the way love goes

i hold you, i love you the best that i can
until you understand that i need you
and i can’t dance alone cos the beat’s just too slow
that’s just the way love goes,
that’s just the way love goes

One More Chance

"Siguro kaya tayo iniiwanan ng mga mahal natin dahil may darating pang ibang mas magmamahal sa'tin - 'yung hindi tayo sasaktan at paasahin... 'yung magtatama ng lahat ng mali sa buhay natin." :)

Us

Soft-Disconnect 1st Anniversary
October 17, 2010
Elbow Room, Metrowalk

Excited!

Celebrating our First Anniversary!

Comcast Soft-Disconnect

Elbow Room, Metrowalk
October 17, 2010 8:00pm

Thoughts

I was checking my other FB account when my cousin started chatting with me.

The usually how are you. How's everybody blah blah blah...

And then out of the blue she asked me if I'm already married (as if they won't know if I was). Told her I was busy with work that marriage is out of the question. Then she said "YOU'RE OLD NA AH?" Thank you very much my dearest cousin. I started forgetting my age when I hit twenty-seven. I stopped counting. Sometimes when people ask how old i was I seemed stuck with that number. And mindfully say, twenty-seven!

I know! I'm turing 33 in about... exactly 11 days from now. But! what I know, I don't look my age! Hehehe! I fooled a lot of people from the office. They think I was in my mid-twenties. It feels good to be old and not look your age. Hahaha!!!

~~~~

Honestly, I really want to be married. I want a church wedding but sometimes I just want to elope and escape all the preparations and stuff. But I know, it is every girls dream to be married in a church. I'm not in a hurry. Not now. Not yet.

A friend of mine is getting married next year. I'm happy for her. So, in my barkada 6 are married and 4 remain single. Who will be next???

~~~~

One experience changed my perspective about marriage. I don't know why. Maybe the experience was too painful and at this point I'm just being careful and a little bit pessimistic. I can't help it! You were led to believe that it is the relationship that would lead to that and all of the sudden it was over. It broke my heart and changed my life.

No, I was not married before and got separated.

I was in a long-term relationship and it ended badly.

Why a change of heart with marriage when it was only a girlfriend-boyfriend relationship?

I don't know.

My five cents, no matter how much you love a person, it will never be enough. It will never be enough to secure the relationship. It will never be enough to bind you together. It will never be enough to make him happy. So what does a piece paper guarantee you? When separation and annulment is a piece of cake now a days.

I'm sorry. I'm being grumpy. I don't intend to burst any bubbles out there.

BOTTOM LINE, I believe, is that I'm so scared. So scared to give my all and be disappointed in the end. To be hurt again and to experience that kind of loneliness and sadness I thought I almost died.

I did died...

I lost a part of me that day and I never saw her again.

~~~~

Don't get me wrong. I love him. I do love him (that someone in my life right now). Although at times he would look at me and ask me why he's feeling that I'm not giving my all. That sometimes I'm so far and he couldn't get to me. One thread is not connecting no matter how much he tries to reach for me. In which I reply his imagination is running wild again. In truth, I'm scared to give him my all and fail in the end. Traumatize? Yes I was.

Sometimes, when I look at him, I see myself. The way he loves, the way he unselfishly give his all without question and the jealousy part! My goodness! Hands down! Hahaha! I'm scared for him sometimes, but one thing is for sure. I've been there and as much as possible I don't want him to feel how painful it was to lose someone you loved with all your heart and soul.

I know, it will take time for me to give my all but I know I'll get there. Sometimes it is just hard to pretend or rather be as happy or excited as he is whenever he talks about our future. He's doing all the planning and he is expecting that I'll be doing my part by next year. That I don't know. A part of me is excited to be getting married and living with him and a part of me is uncertain.

What I'm sure of, is that I want to be whole when we do decide to bind it. Not out of utang na loob, not out of kahihiyan or awa, not because I'm old. I did it because I believe and feel I'm IN LOVE with the person I'm going to spend my whole life with.

Right now, I'm not forcing anything. I just don't want to be rushed. And I just hope that he'll give me time and space sometimes.... :(

Hehehe!

Dahil sick leave ka, sick leave rin ako... :p

Differences

It is so hard to argue with someone who does not want to argue back. Who keeps calm when you are in the verge of losing it. Who keeps quiet when you're trying to make a point and would just nod and look at you as if you are a mad woman.

GAD! Why do you have to be quiet and calm, when all I want you to do is be mad as hell and shout back. But no, you have to be - - - you. Simply you. The one who is willing to take all the wrath and analyze things before you open your mouth.

I hate it.

It makes me hate myself more.

I know I was just trying to make you lose it. In the end it was me who suffered my own doing. Maybe you are just testing me or maybe someday you'll lose it too and be as crazy as me...

Maybe. Maybe not.

:(

Contemplating something really big.

I could almost hear my Nanay's payo, "when in doubt, don't."

What am I to do... Think. Think. Think.

:(

Conversations

I: Tl, I would like to request for VL on October 7 and 8 please...

R: Ok. Later... (busy sa stats ng team, parang walang narinig! hehehe!)

~~~~

R: Ina, are you sure VL for October 7 and 8, I'll be sending a tandim na.

I: Yes Tl!

R: Wait! what about Alex?

A: Yes Tl me too!

I: Huh? Ako lang! Di sya kasama tl!

R: What Alex? Are you sure?

A: Yes Tl!!!!

I: Ano ba! Bakit kelangan pati sya? Di naman magkadugtong mga bituka namin ah? Pag nakaleave ako dapat sya rin????

R: (deadma)

A: Bleh!!! Sama ako syempre!

I: Hay nako!!!!!! Kaasar!

:P

~~~~

R: Ina, Alex, Ron your VL's approve na!

Haay...

Sick yet again with colds...

Can't smell and can't taste a single thing. Whaaa!!! I'm hungry but too lazy to cook anything. Craving for something I don't know what.

Spent time with Edward this whole weekend. Missed him so much. Almost two months din kami hindi nagkasama during my off. Hay... So kulit and so harot parin.

All in a week's work.

What a week!

And the weekend is already over. Hayz... :(

Got the final stats from August.

Good news: We are the top team.

Bad news: September stats will be the ONLY basis for our next shift bid. Effing shit! So effing unfair! TARGET: 4x11 for the Christmas Holiday!

Good news: I placed 4th in the over all RPC standing of the whole Michigan and my best buddy Ron got first! Yahoo! And my AHT is less than 400sec. Finally, TL stopped bugging me. Been hitting all three goals perfectly. Wala na syang reklamo. Hehehe!

Bad news: Feeling the STRESS and PRESSURE as we begin the month of September! Whaaa!!! Been monitoring my stats. I know I'm okay for the last two weeks. Hopefully for the rest of the team too. Ika nga ni TL, pukpukan na! And even in my dreams I could still hear him "AHT guys! AHT!!!" Hay!!!

Good News: I know, TEAM RED will be the top team for September! Sobrang positive thinking yan! Sana lang talaga. Huhuhu! Will be getting our jacket soon! This week or next week! I'm so excited with that also. Just in time for our 1 year anniversary with Soft-Disco. Sana lang okay ang party this October.

~~~~

Got paranoid last Wednesday after shift. I felt sick and had chills. I felt I was floating. When I got home my temp was already 38 and I thought I had dengue na. Buti nalang naagapan ng bioflu, vitamins and rest. Was not able to go to work on Thursday.

Friday, it's a double pay pala. Yahoo! Buti nalang pumasok ako! Hehehe! After shift, went to Banchetto again - sans the pam-pam girls. Food trip and people watch with Love. Got to talk about a text and a call he received. At ayun na nga yun. Was too tired to argue about it and I didn't want to ruin the day. But it really bothered me a lot.

Although, I really trust him and I do know and feels that he really loves me. But having an ex call and text him out of the blue and with that kind of request, hhmm... parang iba na ata yun diba? I just told him, you decide but keep in mind what my opinions are. A day after, everything's okay na. End of story. End of her. Hehehe!

~~~~

Sunday, was supposed to watch UAAP with Ron and Choi but I canceled at the last minute I didn't feel like going and Love had an RDOT so, sabi ko rest nalang muna tayo this weekend. Wala munang gimik. Although last minute din nag-aya syang magdinner kahit 2hours lang daw sa Metrolane. Tried the Mang Inasal. Yummy!

Di rin talaga (nya) matiis na di magkita kahit isang araw lang... Hay! :p At nagpupumilit pang dun ako matulog sa kanya. Sabi ko nalang, "paalam ko lang sa bahay magdidinner lang tayo dito sa Metrolane, para bang nautusan lang akong bumili ng toyo tapos di na umuwi!" in which he said "kamo di toyo nabili mo, SAGING!" muntik ko na mabuga ung halo-halo sa mukha nya! Hahaha!

~~~~

Sept 7, 2010 marked my 1st year anniversary working in a call center. Wow! 1 year have passed already and I didn't even notice it. It is true, time flies so fast when you're enjoying what you're doing.

I could still remember our first day with Sir George Caluaug, our ESL instructor. Grabe! I was so so so nervous but excited at the same time. From 24 agents, now 6 are left from our training team. Buti nalang all six of us are still under one team and we love each other terribly maski minsan may mga conflict. Di naman maiiwasan yun lalo na kung puro babae kayo. :)

At first, I thought I will not survive this kind of working environment. But then I realized kaya ko pala na baliktad ang mundo ko and honestly mas gusto ko ng gabi. Obviously, even if it is my rest day, I'm still wide awake at this hour. Siguro dahil din, ok ang mga ka-team ko and my supervisor. And even if sometimes stressful ang work, once I'm logged out or sometimes kahit sa break lang, ok nako. Hindi kasi ganun ka grabe ang mga customer. Collection is easier than billing or DTA. Collect ka lang ng collect ng bayad! Hahaha! I enjoy meeting a lot of different people and I love the friendly competition. And at this point, I know I'm enjoying everything work-wise.

Plus, somebody came into my life unexpectedly.

It started one time when we were in NE pa. When I asked you to talk to me and to seat beside me. Tapos nasundan ni Dhez na pasimuno. Nung birthday ni Jev na holding hands daw... Na hindi na binitiwan ni loko nag kamay ko at kung mahihiwalay man agad-agad namang kukunin! Hahaha! (Lasing ka na nun! Di mo na siguro maalala! Ungas ka eh!) Yun pala matagal mo na gusto hawakan kamay ko at kung bakit lagi kitang nahuhuling nakatingin sa akin wala pa akong clue nun! Hahaha!

We started na para bang urong sulong. Not sure kung itutuloy o hindi. I was a bit hesitant but then in the end naging makulit ka rin and you stand firm even if I was pushing you away.

And you are one of the reasons why I love going to work and why I want to strive hard too.

And I believe that everything happens for a reason.

And looking back and looking where I'm at right now, I've come full circle. I'm happy. :)

Okay fine. Sige taon na rin ang pinagsamahan nyo. Pero it doesn't mean kelangan nyo ring maging super duper bestfriend after the relationship ends.

Friends can be lovers but lovers becoming friends? Duh?!

Bakit sya nagpaparamadam? Dahil the EX just recently broken up with her boyfriend so kelangan nya ng a shoulder to lean on?

And why the sudden interest to apply in the same company that we work in? And why the hell did the EX even said kung pwedeng makitira sayo while applying in our company??? Bakit pa sya lalayo eh ang daming call center sa North! Haller!!!! The nerve naman!

At mabuti naman sinabi mong hindi sya pwedeng tumira sayo dahil sa akin. Pero hindi ko gusto yung sinabi mong okay lang na magwork sya with us. I mean, under one roof! At magiging casual nalang pag nakita - if ever. No way! Ayoko!

I will not be comfortable knowing the EX is just a few floors or a few bay away from us. Sa tingin mo hanggang casual lang yun. I doubt it!

Basta alam mo na opinion ko. Period!!!!

Ayoko ng complication at ayoko ng gulo.

Hay Nako!!!

Bakit kasi kelangan pang gawing bestfriend (kuno) ang ex! EX na nga eh!

PAST IS PAST sabi mo!

Eh bakit di pa ibaon sa limot ang nakaraan.

They just complicate things!

Kung kelan naman ok na tayo tsaka naman may umeeksana!

Hay! You got a lot of explaining to do. For now, I'll let you rest muna. May RDOT ka pa mamaya eh. Mamaya na ang world war III. Hehehe!!! Maghanda ka! Hmmp!!!!!!!!!!!

Message

LOVE YOU SO MUCH..

You are the reason of my smile everyday.

My strength to strive hard everyday.

You'll be my wife (soon) and my love forever.

All I want is to be with you all the time....

~~~~

Someone is being emo again. Hehehe!!! Love you too! Sleep na!

Banchetto, 8.28.2010

Last day of shift, we were supposed to have our breakfast at McDonalds as we usually do but then we decided to go to Banchetto for a change.

Before lunch actually we were planning to go to Banchetto already but then Armie and Jane asked us to join them at Tiende for our lunch, medyo sawa na sa pantry food. Hehehe!!! For just 75.00 you have a 1pc bbq, a cup of rice and a generous serving of sisig, medyo nabusog na kami and decided to cancel Banchetto na. But then, I said maki-usi lang tayo though he's been there before and it's my first time, I just want to see the food.

From a far, you could see the smoke na and smell the food. Sa amoy palang medyo na umay na ako. Hehehe! Daming food! I love the barbecue! The crowd's mostly from call centers and a few foreigners here and there and people dressed in their pajamas.

Still full from our lunch, we just tried a couple of sticks of isaw and tenga and shared a monster(?) burger. Na medyo he didn't like and honestly I didn't like too. Medyo bland ang taste and the bread was mostly hangin. I don't know why people are falling in line sa medyo over rated na burger. I miss Bite Club! I'll take him there one of these days. Love the mango melon juice though, taste just right.

While waiting for our burger that took like 30mins to cook, saw mharz, cat and mildred who didn't stop teasing us to death! Kalerky!!! Cat who couldn't stop taking our pictures. Pampam na sa floor hanggang sa labas pampam parin! Anoh bah! :p

Before sunrise we went home na. I still want to go back and try some pasta and mouth watering viands and cakes. Hay!

Hay...

Jovani and Benny

I can't believe the weekend is gone already. Another work week ahead though I didn't go to work today as I feel so tired and my whole body aches. I'm wondering why... hhmm... :p

After last Thursday shift, I stayed at his place and went to work together for Friday shift and I went home Saturday morning.

It was nice. It was not planned. Had to buy clothes at Tiendesitas and had to endure my co-workers jokes about my clothes not ironed out. Buti nalang I have extra undies! Hahaha!!!

Sunday, met with him in Cubao to buy his shoes and while having coffee at Starbucks, I called Benny to just say hi. At ayun nag-aya magtwo buckets daw. At kahit he's in Makati, sugod ang lola mo sa Cubao with his jowa. Saya naman... Ester came too as she's in Farmers lang daw. Ayun... biglaang inuman session. Masaya talaga pag di planned eh. Mga tipong biglaan lang.

Ordered two buckets of San Mig, Sisig Kilaw (everbody loved it), Sisig tuna, French Fries, Gerry's Fried Chicken and Mango Juice for Ester.

After Gerry's went to his place and I went home around 4am today.

So tired but happy. He went to work and I didn't. Hehehe!!!

love the new phone ester!

For You....

Love is not blind - It sees more and not less,but because it sees more it is willing to see less.

Within you I lose myself. Without you I find myself wanting to be lost again.

At any rate, let us love for a while, for a year or so, you and me. That's a form of divine drunkenness that we can all try.

If I could reach up and hold a star for every time you've made me smile, the entire evening sky would be in the palm of my hand.

We all want to fall in love. Why? Because that experience makes us feel completely alive. Where every sense is heightened, every emotion is magnified, our everyday reality is shattered and we are flying into the heavens. It may only last a moment, an hour, an afternoon. But that doesn't diminish its value. Because we are left with memories that we treasure for the rest of our lives.

And you learn that love, true love, Always has joys and sorrow, Seems ever present, Yet is never quite the same, Becoming more than love and less than love, So difficult to define. And you learn that through it all, You really can endure, That you really are strong, That you do have value.

The most eloquent silence; that of two mouths meeting in a kiss.

Love knows no reasons,love knows no lies. Love defies all reasons, love has no eyes. But love is not blind, love sees but doesn't mind.

To the world you may be one person,but to one person you may be the world.

Love is always bestowed as a gift -- freely, willingly, and without expectation.... We don't love to be loved; we love to love.

Find the person who will love you because of your differences and not in spite of them and you have found a lover for life.

Love doesn't make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.

The most wonderful of all things in life, I believe, is the discovery of another human being with whom ones relationship has a glowing depth, beauty, and joy as the years increase. This inner progressiveness of love between two human beings is a most marvelous thing, it cannot be found by looking for it or by passionately wishing for it. It is a sort of Divine accident.

Love is not just looking at each other, its looking in the same direction.

The Grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, something to love, and something to hope for.

With love and patience, nothing is impossible.

~~~

Thank you for everything.

For being patient with me, for all the understanding and pangungulit. You make me happy and make me feel so loved and I really do appreciate all the things you do for me.

Thank you for loving me.

Go Home Early to Tiendesitas

August 9 to 13 was Skip Week and our second week being in the opening shift. Love the shift, all the payment comes in around this time. The teams RPC is doing soooo good! Hehehe!

Last night our team was offered a GHE. Well its been offered for the past four days but nobody was interested because it is the middle of the week and everybody was lazy to go home, still eager to get our RPC higher. But then, last night being a Friday - gimik night, Armie said if ever it gets offered again she and Jane will take it and will go to Tiende for a little bit of drinking and asked if anybody would like to come along. I immediately said I'm game! I have already hit my quota and I'm good to go for this weeks stat and Alex agreed to do the same. Happy!

True enough, after a few minutes 4 slots were offered first and then followed by 5 more. Dell, Ester, Cath, Mars, and Jo took it while Ron, Mommy Ria and Jaime stayed behind to finish the shift. Nagpapayaman! :p

Friday night, Tiendes activity area was packed. Luckily we found a good table. It was fun! Listened to some bands performance. We had some good laughs and enjoyed every moment. Ruby who's 4x11 and didn't have a shift that night, came also.

Next week, serious mode na ulit. No more GHE anytime soon... :(

Bob Ong Quotes

Just some of the things i liked:

"Lahat naman ng tao sumeseryoso pagtinamaan ng pagmamahal. Yun nga lang,
hindi lahat matibay para sa temptasyon."

"Gamitin ang puso para alagaan ang taong malapit sayo. Gamitin ang utak
para alagaan ang sarili mo."

"Huwag mong bitawan ang bagay na hindi mo kayang makitang hawakan ng iba."

"Huwag mong hawakan kung alam mong bibitawan mo lang."

"Huwag na huwag ka hahawak kapag alam mong may hawak ka na."

"Pag may mahal ka at ayaw sayo, hayaan mo. Malay mo sa mga susunod na
araw ayaw mo na din sa kanya, naunahan ka lang."

"Hiwalayan na kung di ka na masaya. Walang gamot sa tanga kundi
pagkukusa."

"Pag hindi ka mahal ng mahal mo wag ka magreklamo. Kasi may mga tao rin
na di mo mahal pero mahal ka. Kaya quits lang."

"Wag magmadali sa pag-aasawa. Tatlo, lima, sampung taon sa hinaharap,
mag-iiba pa ang pamantayan mo at maiisip mong di pala tamang pumili ng
kapareha dahil lang sa kaboses niya si Debbie Gibson o magaling
mag-breakdance. Totoong mas importante ang kalooban ng tao higit anuman. Sa
paglipas ng panahon, maging ang mga crush ng bayan sa eskwelahan e
nagmumukha ring pandesal. Maniwala ka."

"ayokong nasasanay sa mga bagay na pwede namang wala sa buhay ko "

"hindi dahil sa hindi mo naiintindihan ang isang bagay ay
kasinungalingan na ito. at hindi lahat ng kaya mong intindihin ay
katotohanan. "

"Mangarap ka at abutin mo. Wag mong sisihin ang sira mong pamilya,
palpak mong syota, pilay mong tuta, o mga lumilipad na ipis. Kung may
pagkukulang sa'yo mga magulang mo, pwde kang manisi at maging rebelde.
Tumigil ka sa pag-aaral, mag-asawa ka, mag-drugs ka, magpakulay ka ng buhok
sa kili-kili. Sa bandang huli, ikaw din ang biktima. Rebeldeng walang
napatunayan at bait sa sarili."

SShhh....

Why do you have to complicate things?

When everything is going smoothly you had to ask me that question over and over and over again.

Stop pressuring me! I hate it when you start doing it.

Burnout? This early? Hhhmm....

Hay... Too much information.

I need some time off. I'm tired. So tired. Physically and mentally tired.

Love is complicated.

Life is complicated.

Sunday Night

After our APE yesterday, together with Choi and Ron, Love and I went to Yoohoo! for a couples night out. It was fun. Last minute gimik. Originally Love and I just planned to have a quiet evening at his place. But then, bonding with another couple is much better.

Went there and the place was packed had to wait for at least 10minutes to get a table. Ordered Sisig, inihaw na tenga (very yummy!), bbq (the best!), inihaw na pwet ng manok for Ron, and fries for me, had two orders of them, been craving for it for the past few days and 3 buckets of Red Horse. Wonderful night!

We planned to go out of town as we celebrate out first year in our job. I'm excited! Hopefully matuloy sya. :P

After Yoohoo! went to his place.

Now, I'm home at last. Missed my room, missed my bed. Alone at last after one week... :)

Awat muna sa kulitan at minsang pikunan at away. Hehehe!

Thank you...

It's hard for me to say the things
I want to say sometimes
There's no one here but you and me
And that broken old street light

Lock the doors
We'll leave the world outside
All I've got to give to you
Are these five words when I

Thank you for loving me
For being my eyes when I couldn't see for
Parting my lips when I couldn't breathe
Thank you for loving me
Thank you for loving me

I never knew I had a dream
Until that dream was you
When I look into your eyes
The sky's a different blue

Cross my heart
I wear no disguise
If I tried, you'd make believe
That you believed my lies

Thank you for loving me
For being my eyes when I couldn't see
For parting my lips when I couldn't breathe
Thank you for loving me

You pick me up when I fall down
You ring the bell before they count me out
If I was drowning you would part the sea
And risk your own life to rescue me, yeah

Lock the doors
Leave the world outside
All I've got to give to you
Are these five words when I

Thank you for loving me
For being my eyes oh, when I couldn't see
You parted my lips when I couldn't breathe
Thank you for loving me

When I couldn't fly
Oh, you gave me wings
You parted my lips when I couldn't breathe
Thank you for loving me

Thank you for loving me
Thank you for loving me
Oh for loving me

It's alright...

"Could we move our weekend get-away by August?"

I heard him asked me nervously as I ate my charbroiled burger at Tiendesita's - our meeting place before going to work.

"Why naman? We've planned it na diba?"

"I was thinking coz of the transition and stuff. Baka pwede ma-move?"

"No problem!"

Hahaha! He was really nervous while asking me. Para namang kakainin ko sya ng buhay.

"Don't look so surprise Love. Honestly, okay lang. Although I was really looking forward to it pero kung di pwede, ok lang talaga."

"Promise, I'll make it up to you."

~~~~

That was last Friday before work. Saturday morning, we had breakfast at our favorite Pares before going to my place because the day before, he planned to sleep over - again. And he said sabay na kaming pumasok come Saturday shift. As usual, we were not able to sleep not until around 12noon because of the harutan and stuff. I was tired and so sleepy. I woke up around 5:30pm and was trying to wake him up. Had our dinner then around 6:30pm he said tinatamad daw syang pumasok.

"Really? Are you serious? Ikaw tinatamad pumasok?"

Sabay bigyan lang ako ng naughty smile nya.

"Okay fine! Sickline nalang."

~~~~

We ended up not going to work. We were laughing of what Ron might think because she knew Love was going to sleep at my place and we were supposed to go to work. Pero dahil sa tinamad sya naginuman nalang kami.

He told me his sentiments about our relationship - again. How until now he still feels I'm not really in love with him and how he feels I'm not taking everything seriously. He said he's not blaming me if I felt traumatized by my last relationship. But he said, he's a totally different person. He's not like my ex daw he kept telling me over and over and over again. I told him, I'm not "not serious" about the relationship, it is just that, I've learned to take it easy. I've learned that, by loving someone and believing that person loves you too, is not enough to make all things go smoothly. Dapat talaga, conscious effort by two person to make it work.

He wants me to believe in love daw. He learned to accept na ganun talaga na ako ngayon, pero what he wants to happen is that kahit na I'm not thinking about the future - our future, he wants may plans parin kami. He kept bugging me about living in together. But I can't not now. Not yet. I have so many things pa to take care of before I could leave. Plus the fact na he's not into dogs din kasi. He's not a dog person. And we need to find a place that could accommodate 5 dogs! Hahahaha! Just the thought of it, ayaw na nya. Well except si Mandy na medyo nakakasundo na nya. She's used to him. Di na nya kinakahulan at gustong makipaglaro sa kanya, kaso nga he can't. Due to a childhood experience. Hahaha!!!

~~~~

Seriously, I love every moment that we have. We do work together and we see each other everyday. He would sometimes sleep here at home and I would sometimes sleep at his place. And it feels nice na he wants to live with me na. That would be a chance for me to take care of him more better. But then, something is not right. I feel it. As what my mother used to say "when in doubt, don't." I'm not in a hurry about what's going on between me and him. I'm not jumping right at the opportunity just because I know I'm not getting any younger or whatever. But I have a gut feel not to hurry things up. In the right time maybe, I would feel na it's time na. I would feel na he's the one na talaga.

I'm just enjoying every attention I get from him and my chance to take care of him and our moments together. What I know is that, when I feel down and when I feel tired at work, all I had to do is look at him and when I see him smile at me, nawawala na pagod ko. And sometimes when I'm too lazy to go to work, the thought of being with him and seeing him is enough encourage me to go to work.

Ron said I am in love and is just afraid to admit it. Maybe I am. Maybe.

All I know is that I'm happy now and the people around me are happy to know that I'm happy. Daming nag react sa change status ko sa Facebook ah... Hahahaha!!!

~~~~

We started drinking at 10pm and finished at around 4am! Can you believe that... Kwentuhan at walang kamatayang kwentuhan lang... We finished off by eating at this Tapsilogan near my house. I didn't like it though. Hehehe!

Then we slept until 4pm Sunday. Had early dinner before he went home. Later naman at around 3pm my turn to go to his place. I'm cooking spaghetti! Yummy!

...

Apologizing does not mean
that you are wrong and the other person is right...
It just means that you value your relationship more that your ego...

...

So looking forward to our weekend get-away. You promised! Few more weeks... Hehehe!

Sick again...

Ever since flu season started, I got sick na.

Friday shift, I started sneezing. I knew I was going down with something. True enough, by the end of the shift I was teary eyed and with a runny nose.

By the time I got home I was having a splitting headache and my nose is already clogged. Was not able to get a decent sleep and plus the fact that Love and I was having a slight tampuhan because of me being cold lately over him and he felt I was not taking the relationship seriously and he ignored me for a couple of days. The nerve! Hahaha! Actually, I was. I was a bit cold intentionally. But that's another story.

Anyways, I was not able to report to work for Saturday shift. I was dead tired.

Sunday, Love surprised me by coming over. Maski ang lakas lakas ng ulan, sugod ang gago. He wants to take care of me daw.

Hhmm.. Ano kayang take care iyon??? HAhaha!!! Nagdala ng kung ano-anong food na hindi ko naman malasahan dahil sa barado kong ilong. He ended up eating all the junkfoods, cake and chicken. Did nothing but watched TV and DVD until I fell asleep.

Woke up, tulog na rin ang gago sa tabi ko. Pero syempre.. May konting QT narin! Nabitin ata ako este!! Nabinat ata ako! Hahaha!!!

Hay nako! He can be sweet really, at times. Pero pag dating sa work. Work lang talaga. He's very strict. Palibhasa POC kasi. Madalas mainit ang ulo. Walang love love sa floor. Pero nauutusan ko naman! Hahaha!

Thanks Love for looking after me this weekend. Making an effort to spend time with me and to clear things out. It meant a lot.

Mwah! Mwah! Mwah!

Basta steady lang...

Tatay

I dreamt of my dearest Tatay last night. We were celebrating his birthday. A lot of relatives came and from my own family, aside from my Tatay, me and my two older sisters were the only ones there.

Funny thing is, Ate Cindy played the organ while Tatay and I danced and my Ate Jean sung.

In reality, when I was a little girl, whenever Ate Jean plays the organ, Tatay would grab me and spun me around and around. We would dance until I was dizzy. Those were some of my fondest memory of my dear Tatay.

He loves to dance and sing. He would laugh his heart out and enjoy every moment.

I still miss him. I would tell stories of him to my closest friends and would still shed some tears whenever I remember all the happy moments we had.

It's been 11 years now since he died and still it feels like it was only yesterday when he left us.

He's not a perfect father but he tried his best to provide and give us the life he never had when he was young. He's pretty proud of what he's become and what he had achieved and by God, he deserves everything he had accomplished. He may be not the kind of father that would make lambing or would say I love you, but I know he loved us. He gave all he had for our family.

Wherever you are my Tatay, you are always in heart and in my prayers. Thank you for everything.

I LOVE YOU!

I still miss you so much...

...

I used to wish for the same thing - - -
someone to love and who'll love me back.

But today,

I think I'm going to wish for something else - - -
the wisdom and maturity to realize that I won't find
what I want by looking for it...

That I shouldn't expect someone else to give me
what I never gave to myself.

That I'm NOT a half,
waiting to be made whole.

And even if that special person never comes along,
I'll be just fine... :)

...

Live life fully while you're here.
Experience everything.
Take care of yourself and your friends.
Have fun, be crazy, be weird.
Go out and screw up!
You're going to anyway,
so you might as well enjoy the process.

Take the opportunity to learn from your mistakes:
find the cause of your problem and eliminate it.

Don't try to be perfect;
just be an EXCELLENT example of being human...

Appointments

Went to my ob-gyne last Friday, had my scheduled Pap-smear. Will get the result by next Saturday. Crossing my fingers everything is all well down there. Hhmm...

The next six days would be something to look forward to. Bring all the pain now! Doc said take it easy with the pain killers, if I can handle it, don't drink anymore. So I'll be a masochist even for a week. Hahaha! Embrace the pain!

Seriously, I hope everything will be okay. I'm having some cramps and back pains. But I know it will be all worth it. Preparing for something special in the near future. But I'm really having second thoughts. Kung pwede naman ipagpaliban pa, why not. It will all depend on the circumstances. Pero as much as possible, ayoko pa sana. I know someone who is so eager to volunteer! Hahaha! Ganun lang ba yun!? At hanggnag dun lang ba yun? Coz' if you're going to ask me, gusto ko hanggang dun lang yun. Kaso it doesn't look like you'll be contented na maging hanggang dun lang yun. No strings attach please. :p

Hay! Decisions decisions decisions!

My back is killing me! I need a rub! Whaaaa!!!!

Love It!

I'm loving the new Template Designer by Blogspot... Inspiring me to post more... Hehehe!!!

...

Still feeling a little bit down. Didn't go to work yesterday and tonight. Need to rest and sleep a little bit longer. Will need a lot of energy to survive this illness. Good thing it is my rest day tomorrow til Monday. Plenty of time to rest.

I miss working. It gets a little bit boring staying here at home almost half of the day doing nothing but sleep. Been to my doctor twice now and still waiting for the results, hope its going to be good news by the end of my medication. And then more test, test and test.

I hate hospitals. I don't want to stay there any longer than having a check-up. But there's nothing I can do.

Buti nalang may nangungulit every now and then... :)

4:00am

H: "u awake?"

S: "yup!"

H: "bakit?"

S: "eh nagtext ka eh! istorbo! joke! I slept almost half of the day na eh... woke up early tuloy"

H: "ano sabi ng doctor, how was ur check-up?"

S: "ayun! more test pa daw. u on break?"

H: "yeah... pasok na ko. miss you! mwah!"

S: "okies... "

H: "love you... "

S: "......"

H: "cge na nga.... basta love you!"

~~~~

6:45pm

H: "Gising kana Love? Musta check-up?"

S: "Yeah... Okay naman. More medications lang then be back for more test."

H: "Are you going to work na tonight?"

S: "Not yet... Total rest daw eh... Be back Tuesday night."

H: "Miss you na..."

S: "Pano mo naman ako namimiss? One day palang tayo di nagkikita..."

H: "Basta, di kita nakikita at nakakasama..."

S: "Cheesy!!! Hahaha!"

H: "Eh di wag! Wag kang maniwala."

S: "Asus! Tampo ang baby ko.... Hehehe!"

H: "Wag nalang nga...."


Hahahaha!!!! :p

Do you two have chemistry?

Sweaty palms? Sort of. A pounding heart? A bit. Even so, you’re still not completely sure there are sparks between you. Understandable: While it’d be nice to think that the earth moves and the angels sing when you’ve found The One, sometimes the signals that you two are truly meant for each other are much more subtle than that. Here are seven dead giveaways that singles often miss — know that if you spot one or more of them on your next date, that’s good news.

Subtle sign #1: You turn into a total klutz

So far, you’ve dropped your fork and knocked over your water glass…and that’s before the entrées have arrived. While embarrassing, these gaffes are actually a good sign. “When you have serious chemistry, your body produces elevated levels of the neurotransmitter norepinephrine,” says Helen Fisher, Ph.D., research professor of anthropology at Rutgers University. This, in turn, can make you jittery, uncoordinated, and a little accident-prone. And if you’re embarrassed by your klutziness, that’s a good sign too! Because if you don’t care what your date thinks of you, you probably don’t think much of your date.

Subtle sign #2: You notice a tiny dent in your date’s pinkie nail
Or that your date’s hair flips up on the left but under on the right. You’ve never noticed something like that about a person before, so why now? Because when there’s true chemistry, the body’s levels of the chemical dopamine rise and lead to “imprinting,” a theory of attachment discovered by German ethologist and Nobel Prize winner Niko Tinbergen. This imprinting makes you focus on this one person more clearly and notice the tiniest, most insignificant details about a person — including possessions. Says Dr. Fisher, “Your date’s car in the parking lot looks different. His or her backpack looks different. That person’s coat on the coat rack stands out. Everything is special, novel, unique.” CHECK!!!

Subtle sign #3: You agree to split the spinach dip appetizer — and you don’t even like spinach dip!
True chemistry makes us more mellow than usual — so don’t be surprised if you find yourself being agreeable with your date in ways you might not with anyone else: You don’t mind walking 10 blocks with your date from your parking spot. You’re suddenly up for seeing a Rob Schneider movie. And even though you’re not a fan of Indian food, what the heck, you’ll give it another shot. “When you’re falling in love, you more easily surrender your boundaries because of a strong desire to merge with that person,” explains Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., author of Keeping the Love You Find. CHECK!!!

Subtle sign #4: The room you’re in seems brighter than usual
Did someone nudge up the dimmer switch? Perhaps. But it could also mean you’re smitten, thanks to a physiological reaction discovered by University of Chicago biopsychologist Eckhard Hess, a pioneer in the area of “pupillometrics.” In short, Hess found that when people look at something or someone that causes positive feelings or sparks interest, their pupils dilate in an attempt to take in more of it, also letting in more light as well. CHECK!!!

Subtle sign #5: You’re more fidgety during the date
If you find yourself stroking your own arm, tapping your leg, or otherwise fidgeting during the date, rest assured: Whether you fully know it or not, you like this person. “These are ‘displacement gestures’ — what you do when you’re trying to decide what to do with yourself,” explains Dr. Fisher. “If someone is smiling at you and you can’t decide if you should smile back or look away, you play with your hair. Or you run your tongue along your teeth.” This happens because your brain is over-stimulated, leading you to vent the extra energy with a little self-grooming. Some experts even argue that stroking your own arm or leg indicates a subconscious desire to reach out and touch the person you’re with.

Subtle sign #6: You keep forgetting there’s food on the table
When you’re out with someone who doesn’t float your boat, boy, do those garlic mashed potatoes taste good. But if you’re feeling a chemical attraction to someone, the food being served is the last thing on your mind — and not just because you’re nervous. Blame this on elevated levels of the neurotransmitter dopamine, which fuels feelings of desire. Higher levels of dopamine, according to Dr. Fisher, “give you a feeling of lightness, increased energy and a feeling of minor ecstasy. And you’re definitely not hungry!” So if your date seems disappointed that you only ate four bites of your steak, you can clear it up later by explaining what a five-star sign it really is.

Subtle sign #7: You feel more “familiar” with your date than “lusty”
Sure, most people think it’s a good sign when they want to jump over the table and rip their date’s clothes off. But let’s be honest—there are plenty of acquaintances you’ve wanted to do that to, and there was no deeper, underlying chemistry there. A stronger sign is that instead of feeling lust for your date, you’re overwhelmed by a feeling of familiarity — a sense of, “Gosh, I feel like I’ve known you before.” The chemistry at work, says Dr. Hendrix, “is due to the emotional center in your brain’s limbic system recognizing qualities in the person that resemble qualities about the caretakers we had during childhood.” For example, a man might recognize a feeling of being at ease and nurtured the way his mother made him feel. A woman might feel comfortable with the dry humor of her date, similar to the way her father interacted with her. “This intense familiarity triggers the release of dopamine, which can lead to that ‘Wow’ feeling,” explains Dr. Hendrix. Oh, and by this point, it’s also definitely OK to want to jump over the table and rip your date’s clothes off! CHECK!!!

~~~~

4 out of 7... Hmm... not bad... HAHAHA!!!

Party Time

COMCAST Soft-Disco
Michigan and New England - TEAM JON CAB

STOP LIGHT PARTY

Moomba, Mo. Ignacia St., Quezon City
May 30, 2010 / 8:00pm


wear red top if you're taken, yellow if its complicated
and green if you're single and ready to mingle...

...

Lazy Monday morning.

Tired but happy.

Thanks Love for a nice Sunday night. Hehehe! :p

...

Woke up late... Didn't go to work. Hehehe! Spending time with my baby instead. :p

Surprise Surprise!!!

Last Friday night, I was on my way to work when I saw my good old brother. The second from the eldest. He said he has a gift for me. Advance birthday gift. I laughed when I heard him say that. I didn't believe him until he gave me a small box. WTF! A new cellphone! Hahaha!!! Is this for real?? I kept asking him. "So what's the catch?" He said nothing. Just a gift. Talk about surprises.

Well actually, he bought the phone for himself. Over excited kasi. He didn't test if he'll be comfortable using that kind of unit. But then, good thing he didn't like it! I was there for the hand-me-down! Love it!

Although at first, I had a hard time navigating, it will take some time to get used to it. It's fun! Plus Kuya had a 4gig (expandable till 8gig) memory card thrown with it. Can't wait to load all those nice songs I got from a friend.

Samsung GT-S3653W and my other phone E63 (both black) has a new partner now. New cellphones, new numbers. Out with the old, in with the new! Hehehe!!!

Thanks brother dearest! :)

Someday i'll find my Way Back In To Love..

I've been living with a shadow overhead
I've been sleeping with a cloud above my bed
I've been lonely for so long
Trapped in the past, I just can't seem to move on

I've been hiding all my hopes and dreams away
Just in case I ever need em again someday
I've been setting aside time
To clear a little space in the corners of my mind

All I want to do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
Oh oh oh

I've been watching but the stars refuse to shine
I've been searching but I just don't see the signs
I know that it's out there
There's got to be something for my soul somewhere

I've been looking for someone to shed some light
Not somebody just to get me through the night

I could use some direction
And I'm open to your suggestions

All I want to do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
And if I open my heart again
I guess I'm hoping you'll be there for me in the end
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

There are moments when I don't know if it's real
Or if anybody feels the way I feel
I need inspiration
Not just another negotiation

All I want to do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
And if I open my heart to you
I'm hoping you'll show me what to do
And if you help me to start again
You know that I'll be there for you in the end
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

...

Sometimes in life, we must know when to quit.

Accept that no matter how hard we try to make things work, when you know it’s not going to work, it will never work.

We must learn to admit when things are not meant to be, it will never be whatever you do.

The hardest part is, telling it to someone who doesn’t want to give up. I know he’ll hate me and I don’t know if he’ll speak to me ever again.

But then again, I know it is the most dignified thing to do. Saving that person from all the heartaches. Face the consequences.

It all boils down to being honest with what you feel. Hoping that someday that person would find in his heart to forgive you. Hoping that he’ll understand why you have to do it.

It is all about taking full responsibility and moving forward without worrying that you’ve hurt someone from your past because you choose to face the problem head-on than hide behind all the same old shit of “it’s-not-you-it’s-me” reason. Face the music . Have the balls. Have the guts. Have the nerve to tell it to his face that it’s not working.

This is going to be one difficult week for me.

~~~~

He has persistently asked me of how I feel for almost a month now.

I tried.

I really did.

But my whole heart is not into it.

I still tried, but when things started to change, as days go by, between my heart and what his intentions were...

I knew, I have to let go... I have to tell him.

I do love the attention. I like the affection he shows but to be in a relationship again? I’m not sure if I’m ready with all my heart – with all of me.

Let’s put it this way, being in a relationship, I do miss the feeling. I do miss having someone beside me, caring for someone and all that bruhaha, but thinking about all the freedom and choices I have as a single person, it is beyond what I could put into words. This is the first time in my whole life, since I had my first boyfriend, that I’m without a boyfriend for more than four months. It’s been almost nine months now, I do get lonely sometimes but then, looking at all of my options and adventures and besides I’m not really looking for someone just yet, I’m just enjoying the ride until I can. And I know, when the right person comes along, I know the universe will have it’s own way of letting me know that he is the one for me.

But at this point, I don't think so.

Happy Weekend!

Looking forward to this weekend! Crossing my fingers... :p

hhmmm...

Gad! I miss my books. I miss reading.
But I love sleep more... Hahaha!

Hmmm...

I'm not really sure how it all happened.
I was minding my own thing.
Work, work and work is all what I could think of.

Then there you were.
I asked for you to tell me things about you.
You opened yourself, your life.

Little did I know it would be the start.
I was clueless you were falling in love.
I was naive and stupid to even notice.

You had your chance to tell me.
And I was really surprised.
Am I ready? Are you sure?

You kissed me.
I kissed you back.

You held me in your arms.
I cried. You dried my tears.
Told me it's all going to be alright.

Then here we are.
I'm scared and you want me to be happy.
I want you to be happy.

Take my time you said.
And you'll just be by my side.
Promised not to let go...

All I Need

Kissing you was not what I had planned
And now I'm not so sure just where I stand
I wasn't looking for true love
But now you're looking at me
You're the only one I can think of
You're the only one I see

All I need
Is just a little more time
To be sure
What I feel
Is it all in my mind?
'Cause it seems so hard to believe
That you're all I need

I guess it's true we've all been hurt before
But it doesn't seem to matter anymore
It's maybe a chance we're taking
But it always comes to this
If this isn't love we're making
Then I don't know what it is

All I need
Is just a little more time
To be sure
What I feel
Is it all in my mind?
'Cause it seems so hard to believe
That you're all I need

No stars are out to night
But we're shining our own light
And it's never felt so right
'Cause boy the way I'm feeling
It's easy to believe?
That you're all I need
You're all I need

...

"Reveal to them everything there is to know about you
and let the chips fall where they may."

Find A Way...

Find a way to my heart, and I will always be with you
From wherever you are, I'll be waiting
I'll keep a place in my heart, you will see it shining through
So find a way to my heart, and I will, I will follow you

This journey's not easy for you, I know
If your footsteps get too faint to hear, I'll go
Cos you know, questions are never that easy
And never the same
You have the answer believe me
If you have the faith

Find a way to my heart...

Time may come, and time may go, I know
If you should call out for me, I'll go
But you know, there is a code to be broken
I wrap it around
Without a word being spoken
Without a sound

There's a reason I hide my heart
Out of sight out of mind
And when I find out just who you are
The door will be open for you to..

Find a way to my heart...

Mr. Next

Think your Mr. Next has the potential to be Mr. Right? Before you leap without looking, take an honest inventory. See how many of the following five essential traits he possesses.

Dating Trait #1: He listens to you

The best way to know if Mr. Next is interested in (and worthy of) being a candidate for Mr. Right? He listens to you. You'll know he's listening when he shows genuine concern, consistently remembers things you've told him (your birthday, favorite food, best friend's name, etc.), and offers emotional support in honest and thoughtful ways.

Dating Trait #2: He connects with you easily

We've all been in those relationships that take W-O-R-K (and suck the life force out of us in the process). When a relationship works on its own, it feels effortless, easy, and fluid. You don't have to force anything, forgive anyone, or turn a blind eye to red flags or gut-twisters. Instead, you communicate and collaborate with comfort, compatibility, and undeniable chemistry. If and when you experience this kind of interaction, you are on to something really special.

Dating Trait #3: He wants the real you

So often, women feel the need to sacrifice some part of themselves to make a relationship work. In the right relationship, there's no need. You don't have to hide, tone down, or apologize for any aspect of you or your fabulous life. With the right partner, you're not only able to be yourself, but you're better able to be the best version of your most authentic self -- no compromises needed.

Dating Trait #4: He's trustworthy

A relationship without trust is doomed from the start. But a relationship with abundant trust? A fabulous foundation for real and lasting love! Built over time, trust is based on the simple belief system that your partner has your best interests at heart and will never intentionally hurt you (and vice versa). If and when you discover that Mr. Next is 100 percent trustworthy, you'll have no trouble giving your heart to him. In return, he'll most likely give you his heart and pave the way for a lasting, loving relationship to unfold

Dating Trait #5: He enriches your life

In the wrong relationship, your partner tears you to emotional shreds, brings you down, and in general drains your energy. In the right relationship, he enriches your life, inspires you to be your best self, and brings a sense of peace and possibility to you. You'll know Mr. Next is enriching your life if and when he encourages and supports you professionally, personally, and spiritually. And when he does, he may just be Mr. Right!

Conversations...

H: “Sana kaw ung magpabago ng simple kong buhay”

S: “Gawin nating wild?”

H: “Pwede rin! Hahaha!!!”

~~~

S: “Araw-araw naman tayo nagkikita ah? Hindi pa ba enough yun?”

H: “Di nga kasi sa floor limited ung masolo kita”

S: “Masolo ka dyan! Bad ka hah!”

H: “Kasi gusto ko mawork out ung pagkatok ko sa puso mo…”

S: “Steady lang ha… Easy lang… Let’s not rock the boat too much…”

H: “Oo naman… Sana kaw ang maging partner ko sa buhay… Gawin ko lahat para maging karapat-dapat akong partner mo…”

S: “It’s going to be a long journey…”

H: “Ok lang…”

S: "We'll see..."

AFTER A WHILE (Veronica Shoftshall, 1971)

After a while you learn the subtle difference
between holding a hand and chaining a soul
and you learn that love doesn't mean leaning
and company doesn't always mean security.

And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts
and presents aren't promises
and you begin to accept your defeats
with your head up
and your eyes ahead
with the grace of woman,
not the grief of a child

And you learn to build
all your roads on today
because tomorrow's ground
is too uncertain for plans
and futures have a way
of falling down in mid-flight.

After a while you learn
that even sunshine burns
if you get too much
so you plant your own garden
and decorate your own soul
instead of waiting for someone
to bring you flowers.

And you learn
that you really can endure
you really are strong
you really do have worth
and you learn
and you learn
with every goodbye, you learn...

Then After "after a while" you change and build your hopes again. And pray that maybe this time it will be different. And you hold on to that hope because in the end that's all you really have..

AFTER "AFTER A WHILE"

After 'after a while'
You want to hold a hand
not to chain a soul but to enjoy its company,
and you want someone's lips to kiss,
not because you are lonely but because you are
happy, and you want to give presents
and you want to make promises.

After 'after a while'
You begin to accept your defeats like an adult,
but like a child, will want someone to listen and care,
and you want someone who will build roads with
you today so maybe you can pave the way for your
future together.

After 'after a while'
You want someone's sunshine and warmth,
but also accept the rain and the cold,
and you want to give flowers picked from your
own garden.

And when your garden is picture perfect,
you want it to be more than a picture
even if it means having to be imperfect
because you want someone in it to stay and to live.

Then you'll see that there is
such a thing as love...
and that you were made to live in someone else's
garden...
and you'll know that there is more to life than
yourself.

AND NOW...
You realize that no matter how tightly you hold,
if you're meant to let go, you can
And then you will understand that love
gives you reasons to understand
even the most complicated situations
And you will grow older believing that just
because you have convictions
doesn't mean you're always right

You will remember lips because of the smiles
that made your day,
the words that touched your soul, not only
because of the sweet kisses

And as you graciously accept defeat and absorb
the meaning of lessons learned,
You feel that you are finally being the person
you never thought you'd be

So, armed with courage, strength and confidence,
you will face the world
head on...
With or without an army behind you
Because you know your worth and that alone is an
armor

With more heartbreaks you will cry
But after every heartache, you will rise

Life is a garden ... it takes long to make it beautiful.
But it's always worth the wait..

~~~~

Thanks Hazel for posting this... I love every word of it.

Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

Last day of shift, TL Red approached me with TL Tony from New England. They said they have to take my picture. I asked why and what for? And TL Red it has something to do with me being a top agent for our team for the month of February! Huwaaat!!!! Me?? Top agent for the month of February for our team! I was repeating every word he was saying… My Gad! I was really surprised and I didn’t expect it! And of all the days, they chose to take my picture today when I didn’t have any make up on and I had only 4 hours of sleep… Bummer! But I was happy… TL Red said I should feel proud because not everybody has the chance to be one. By Tuesday shift, my face will be plastered in all the plasma TV’s on the floor together with other team’s top agent!!! Whaaaaaa!!!

~~~~

Saturday night went to Dhezies house at around 11pm to have a drinking session with Ruby, Anthony and Mike, just the five of us. It was fun. Kwentuhan lang about our lives at makinig sa videoke night ng kapitbahay nila Dhez. Hehehe! After six bottles of Redhorse, as a celebration narin for being a top agent, I bought five more bottles of Redhorse. Unang sumuko si Ruby. Well actually she was not drinking much and she went home ahead of me na. Then last two bottles si Dhez naman ang sumuko na and went up and slept already… Hahaha! So for the remaining tagayan, it was only me, Mike and Anthony… Pasulpot-sulpot si Jev to check on us. Finally when I took the last shot na, sabi ko I have to go home na. Maliwanag na kaya! It’s 6am! Hahaha!!! They were convincing me to sleep over nalang.. Sabi ko naman my house is like less than 3 minutes away lang naman and besides Ate Lita will kill me if she learns I didn’t come home.

It was fun seeing Anthony again and meeting Mike.

And now lazy Sunday afternoon nursing a bad hang-over! God! Woke up with a splitting headache! The only part I hate about drinking too much is the next day and when I’m forced to throw up to get rid of the alcohol in my system. I hate it! As much as I could I don’t want to throw-up. I was planning pa naman to go to Cubao and have coffee sana and buy some stuff… Hay I was too lazy… Just spend the day with Edward nalang. Watching whatever on the TV…

Another weekend is gone… Another work week ahead… Hay!!!! Oh my gad! Mamaya na pala ung mga pictures namin makikita! Whaaaa!!!!! Parang ayokong pumasok! Hehehe!

A Dog Story

I just watched Hachiko, a Richard Gere movie based on a Japanese true story about a dog that waited for his master everyday at a train station even after his death; A story of loyalty and unconditional love.

I learned about this story when I was in highschool. I would always catch this show about Japan in channel 9 while I’m preparing for school and one day they feature this story of a bronze statue of a dog at a train station this caught my attention then years after a movie is made.

What really amazes me until now is the capacity of a dog to really love you unconditionally, to be loyal even though there are times when you’re not there to take care of them and when some times you’re too busy and yet they don’t mind and they still love you no matter what.

They will love you when you’re at your worse and be there at your best. No ifs or buts…

I love the movie… pero medyo bitin sya… Hehehe…

I love dog movies… they don’t fail to make me cry everytime…

~~~~~

Let me tell you a story about one of my dogs Mandy that really surprised me.

She’s my first dog and the “ate” of all my dogs here. A little bit spoiled and maldita too but could be very malabing at times. She loves Ate Lita, one of my angels here at home. At night, if Mandy wants to go out and pee she would wake up Ate Lita with her distinct bark and Ate Lita would know that she wants to go out and would open the window and Mandy would do her thing. When Mandy wants to go out she would wake Ate Lita and only her.

But one night, Mandy went to the angel’s room and started barking at Jenelyn and when she woke up thinking that Mandy just wants to go out, she started for the window but then Mandy went the opposite way to where I slept. Jenelyn thinking that there must be something wrong followed her immediately and found Mandy sitting in front of my door and wagging her tail. Only then that Jenelyn realized I was still asleep and it was already 11:30pm and I was going to be late. Then Mandy started barking again and Jenelyn knocked on my door and when I answered only then did Mandy stopped barking.

How could she know that I was still sleeping? How could she know I was going to be late if I didn’t wake up anytime soon? That was the only incident that I almost over slept since I’ve been working. I can’t still believe she did that. Hehehe! When I’m off to work she’s the one who sees me leave and when I come home she’s the first one to greet me. Like as if she could hear or smell me miles away, and when I open the door she’ll be there wagging her tail ready to jump and lick my face.

She’s getting a little old now. I’m not counting the years though; I’m looking forward to having her beside me till I grow old hopefully.

That’s just one of those stories I have with my dogs. I love all of them. They make me happy. They comfort me. They’re there no matter what.